Listen Up!

I'm finding it very hard to actually use this blog for what I thought I wanted to use it for.  Before I started this I thought this would be a good way of getting all my thoughts and feelings down without having to spend twenty minutes looking for a pen then 30 looking for a piece of paper and 4 hours writing down everything I feel I need to. This is only my second entry and I already notice the glitches in my plan!     
     I like the idea of a blog because I like the idea that someone out there somewhere is reading it. In a sense someone is actually listening to what I have to say, what I think, what I feel. And the best part is they can’t interrupt me, they can’t tell me I’m wrong, and in general they just can’t talk back to me. And if someone so chooses to comment on any of my posts it is up to me if I want to keep it there or not I can easily enough just delete it and POOF! It’s like it never even happened.  Wouldn’t that be amazing! Someone actually listening to you for once with no commentary of their own (to bad those people don’t really exist) and even if they did wouldn’t it just feel great to just delete them right out of your life along with everything they ever did or said to you. With one click of a button TAP your life is perfect again. There would be no hurt or pain or suffering because you would just delete it all. There would be no questions of "what happened" or "why" or anything because there would be no evidence of it ever existing.            
       But God had a better idea I guess, he wasn't a big fan of the cyber life pitch I suppose.  So instead we are forced to listen to everybody's opinions, everyone's thoughts, and everyone’s commentary.  I guess I should re phrase that. We are forced to hear everyone's thoughts, opinions, and commentary.  See that's the thing. Nobody actually has to listen to anything anyone says they are just unfortunate enough to have to hear it.  Maybe if we did actually listen to everything everyone out there had to say and I mean really listen to them problems would be easier to solve and decisions easier to make.  Maybe not so many wives would be let down when they remind their husband 3 times to pick up the milk and their husband returns with bullets, beer, potato chips, and NOT milk. Maybe not so many people would feel hurt, ignored, unimportant, and worthless. Maybe if people actually listened things in this world would change and people might be happier, more motivated to actually do something with them because they wouldn't feel so useless.                                                                                     It’s not likely that any of this is actually going to change. People are still going to go about their days just hearing people and not listening to them. People are still going to end up feeling like complete crap because of it. But maybe one person out there is actually reading this crazy rambling blog and maybe that one person whose commentary I will never have to hear or listens to will think "yea she is crazy" (no they definitely will think that) "yea she is crazy but you know what she might be right". Maybe that one person will listen. 

Yes I realize I completely broke every rule that was ever written about writing and this post is just all over the place but I like it!

xoxo,
Kaitlyn Pearl

Crazy, Beautiful Life

 Its 12:30 am and I have decided after much deliberation I have to force myself to just put my fingers on the keyboard and type, and that is because if I never get this first blog written I will never continue with this whole blogging thing and there is a good chance I will just lose my ever loving mind.

I’m 19 years old and i recently just ended a big chapter in my life and am trying to find a way to start writing the next.  Two weeks ago I left the first job I ever had after almost 3 years and became what my boyfriend refers to as a "housewife" although we are not married.  I clean all day and play with our three baby boys. A 4 year old Australian Shepard (Jaxon), a 3 year old Collie/Lab (Dexter), and a 1 year old Pit bull/Something (Cash).  It sounds pretty crazy and I won’t tell you it’s not but it’s my life and I chose it to be what it is.  People like to criticize my crazy beautiful life and I’ll be honest sometimes it would be easy enough to just admit "yea maybe I'm in over my head a bit" but as easy as that would be I know that if I didn’t have my three babies, my one small 2 bedroom apartment, no job, and a boyfriend who loves me unconditionally and would do anything for us I would not be happy.

So that's it, My first blog, the start of a new beginning.

xoxo,
Kaitlyn Pearl

"I love this crazy, tragic, sometimes almost magic, awful, beautiful life"